Friday, 22 November 2019

Love and Obey



"To love and obey..." Those words used to always form part of the marriage vows for the bride. How rarely they are spoken these days. How sad. The original vows of "...love, cherish and obey..." used to form part of the Church of England (American: Episcopal) vows up until they were voted out in 1922 due to them being seen as "men oppressing women". Except the blind leaders of the Church have misled themselves and their flock by denying what is clearly commanded by God of wives through His word:

Ephesians 5:24: Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Ephesians 5:22: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

Titus 2:5: To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

The word I have underlined in bold here in each case is different, but translated from the same Greek word: Hupotasso. Hupotasso translates as "place ones self under the authority of", and as used in the Bible it is translated into the English words: put; submit; submission; obey; obedience; obedient; subject to; and subject unto.


Hupotasso appears in the Bible 32 times. A full list of the verses containing "hupotasso" can be found here: https://godslikeness.blogspot.com/2019/11/where-do-we-find-hupotasso-in-scripture.html

We know that throughout scripture, from Genesis through to Revelation, we are told that our prime duty as Christians is to obey and serve God. I could post hundreds of verses that confirm this, and anyone who reads their Bible would not hesitate to agree. Obedience to God is not optional - if we obey Him, we are doing His will, and we will live the abundant life He has planned for us. Father knows best!

By the same token, wives obedience to their husbands is also not optional. I'll say that again:

A wife's obedience to her husband is not optional.

"WHAT???!!! You have got to be kidding!!!"

No, I'm not. Look again at what it says in Ephesians 5:22: 

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

See that bit at the end I highlighted? "...as unto the Lord". Wives are to submit to their husband "as unto the Lord". They are to HUPOTASSO their husbands "as unto the Lord". Obey. Submit. Be subject to.

End of story.

We have seen those words "...as unto the Lord" elsewhere in scripture:

Colossians 3:23-24: 23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;
24 Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.

We have no problem obeying God in this scripture, so why do the majority of Christians baulk at the same thing in Ephesians 5:22? I have seen many times Colossians 3:23-24 quoted in relation to our careers, and how we should conduct ourselves in our jobs. We happily do our paid work"...as to the Lord" when working for an unsaved boss who has no interest in us beyond our part in the profitability of their business. How much more then should "as unto the Lord" apply to marriage, where the husband wants nothing but the best for his bride?

Marriage is supposed to be a reflection of God's relationship with the Church (His bride) and of God the Son's relationship with the Father. Therefore God has mandated that the husband is the head and the wife is is to follow, submit, and obey her husband, just as we the Church follow, submit and obey God, and how Jesus is obedient to the Father. This is not optional - it is a direct command. Scripture could not be any clearer on this!

So how far does that obedience go? How obedient should a wife be to her husband?

Completely!

Yes, again, if a wife is to submit and be obedient to her husband, as unto the Lord, then she is to submit completely. Ephesians 5:24 also says "...in every thing" God expects us to completely surrender to Him in everything, and as marriage is supposed to be a mirror of our relationship with Him, with the Husband as the supreme authority within the marriage, then anything less than complete surrender and obedience to your husband is falling short of God's will. And what do we call falling short of God's will?

Sin!

Disobedience to God is sin and likewise, a wife failing to obey her husband is sinning. Put plainly:

A wife refusing to obey her husband is sinning against God. 

"So, if I am supposed to obey my husband in everything and completely, does that mean I have to go against God's word and sin if he wants me to?"

Absolutely not! God never tells us to sin, and as your God-ordained head, your husband is not to tell you to sin. If he does, you have the absolute right to refuse. God's authority is supreme! Your husband is commanded by God to present you to Himself as a pure, washed, unblemished bride (Ephesians 5:25-27). How can he do that if he is commanding you to sin? Impossible!

I'll repeat that too: If your husband is telling you to sin or leading you into sin, you have the right to say "No!"

Conversely:

You are to obey your husband in everything that is not sin.

"What if my husband is unsaved and still expects me to obey him? Surely God won't want me to follow the lead of an unsaved man."

Well, actually...

1 Peter 3:1: Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

So, even if your husband is unsaved, you are to hupotasso to him in everything as well, because your example may win him to the Lord.

"So, let me get this straight, saved or unsaved, I am to obey my husband in everything?"

Yes!

"How money is spent?" - Yes!
"What we give?" - Yes!
"Where we give?" - Yes!
"What we save?" - Yes!
"Where we go to church?" - Yes!
"How we serve at church?" - Yes!
"What I eat?" - Yes!
"How much I eat?" - Yes!
"How much I exercise?" - Yes!
"What I drink?" - Yes!
"How much I drink?" - Yes!
"What I wear?" - Yes!
"How much I wear?" - Yes!
"How I conduct myself?" - Yes!
"What we do in the bedroom?" - Yes!
"What we do outside the bedroom?" - Yes!
"How I please him?" - Yes!
"What time I go to bed?" - Yes!
"What time I get up?" - Yes!
"What I wear to bed?" - Yes!
"My screen-time?" - Yes!
"Child rearing?" - Yes!
"What we watch on TV?" - Yes!
"Where we go out?" - Yes!
"Working?" - Yes!
"Socializing?" - Yes!

Everything!

Ephesians 5:24:
 Therefore as the church is hupotasso unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


Where do we find "Hupotasso" in Scripture?



Hupotasso:


  1. to arrange under, to subordinate
  2. to subject, put in subjection
  3. to subject one's self, obey
  4. to submit to one's control
  5. to yield to one's admonition or advice
  6. to obey, be subject


Luke 2:51: And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.

Luke 10:17: And the seventy returned again with joy, saying, Lord, even the devils are subject unto us through thy name.

Luke 10:20: Notwithstanding in this rejoice not, that the spirits are subject unto you; but rather rejoice, because your names are written in heaven.

Romans 8:7: Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

Romans 8:20: For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope,

Romans 10:3: For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God.

Romans 13:1: Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.

Romans 13:5: Wherefore ye must needs be subject, not only for wrath, but also for conscience sake.

1 Corinthians 14:32: And the spirits of the prophets are subject to the prophets.

1 Corinthians 14:34: Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.

1 Corinthians 15:27: For he hath put all things under his feet. But when he saith all things are put under him, it is manifest that he is excepted, which did put all things under him.

1 Corinthians 15:28: And when all things shall be subdued unto him, then shall the Son also himself be subject unto him that put all things under him, that God may be all in all.

1 Corinthians 16:16 That ye submit yourselves unto such, and to every one that helpeth with us, and laboureth.

Ephesians 1:22: And hath put all things under his feet, and gave him to be the head over all things to the church,

Ephesians 5:21: Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 

Ephesians 5:22: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 

Ephesians 5:24: Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Philippians 3:21 Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.

Colossians 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

Titus 2:5: To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Titus 2:9: Exhort servants to be obedient unto their own masters, and to please them well in all things; not answering again;

Titus 3:1: Put them in mind to be subject to principalities and powers, to obey magistrates, to be ready to every good work,

Hebrews 2:5: For unto the angels hath he not put in subjection the world to come, whereof we speak.

Hebrews 2:8: Thou hast put all things in subjection under his feet. For in that he put all in subjection under him, he left nothing that is not put under him. But now we see not yet all things put under him.

Hebrews 12:9: Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?

James 4:7: Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

1 Peter 2:13: Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme;

1 Peter 2:18: Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward.

1 Peter 3:1: Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

1 Peter 3:5: For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

1 Peter 3:22: Who is gone into heaven, and is on the right hand of God; angels and authorities and powers being made subject unto him.

1 Peter 5:5: Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.


Source: https://www.biblestudytools.com/lexicons/greek/kjv/hupotasso.html

Friday, 25 October 2019

"It is written..."




When Jesus was being tempted by the devil in the wilderness, He rebuked Satan at every turn by directly quoting scripture at him. He started each rebuke by saying "It is written...":

Satan couldn't argue with the Word of God, and neither can we!

So, to come against and rebuke the disgusting works of the devil which are so widely accepted, and even promoted in His Church today, here is my own "It is written..."


It is written...Women are not to preach in Church:

"But I suffer not a woman to teach..." 1 Timothy 2:12 

It is written...Women are not to have authority over men:

"...nor to usurp authority over the man..." 1 Timothy 2:12 

It is written...Women are not permitted to lead prayer or lead worship in Church:

"For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints. Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church."  1 Corinthians 14:33-35 (my emphasis added)

It is written...Only men are to lead, be Elders and office bearers of a Church:

"This is a true saying, if a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)"  1 Timothy 3:1-5 (my emphasis added)
" Likewise must the deacons be grave, not doubletongued, not given to much wine, not greedy of filthy lucre; Holding the mystery of the faith in a pure conscience. And let these also first be proved; then let them use the office of a deacon, being found blameless. Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things. Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well." 1 Timothy 3:8-12 (my emphasis added)
" ...and ordain elders in every city, as I had appointed thee: If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly." Titus 1:5-6 (my emphasis added)
" But if I tarry long, that thou mayest know how thou oughtest to behave thyself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth." 1 Timothy 3:15

It is written...Wives are commanded to submit to the authority of their own husband and obey him in everything:

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body." Ephesians 5:22-23 (my emphasis added)
"Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Ephesians 5:24 (my emphasis added)
"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbandsthat the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5 (my emphasis added)

It is written...Wives are commanded to treat their husbands with reverence:

"...and the wife see that she reverence her husband." Ephesians 5:33
"For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement." 1 Peter 3:5-6 (my emphasis added)

It is written...Wives are to be keepers at home, that is their job:

"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own  husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."  Titus 2:4-5 (my emphasis added)

"For all flesh is as grass, and all the glory of man as the flower of grass. The grass withereth, and the flower thereof falleth away: but the word of the Lord endureth for ever. And this is the word which by the gospel is preached unto you."1 Peter 1:24-25

Sunday, 11 August 2019

"Yes master..."


How submissive are you really? I mean really?


"For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Ephesians 5:23-24


"Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives...For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement." 1 Peter 3:1,5-6


We have two different writers here talking about wives being in subjection to their husbands: Paul (in his letter to the Ephesians) and Peter, apostle and former disciple of Christ speaking to the church in general. These are rather strong words and they do not sit well in church circles, let alone in the corrupt feminist world we live in today. Even godly women who consider themselves quite submissive to their husbands would gulp at being subject to their husbands in everything, and I don't know if any would refer to their husbands as "lord". But if God's word never changes, and He is the same yesterday, today and forever, then we need to pay attention to what is being said here as it just as relevent today as it was back in Sarah's day.

There is no escaping these truths.

But is God really telling wives to obey their husbands in everything? Is he really suggesting wives call their husband "lord"? Let's pull these verses apart and see if they really mean what they appear to be saying.

In Ephesians 5 Paul starts off by talking about how we as followers of Christ are to behave towards each other, then in verse 22 he hones in on marriages and how husbands and wives are to behave toward each other. Here he forms an image of the marriage relationship being a reflection of Jesus' relationship with His bride - the Church. God the Son was in submission to God the Father (never the other way around!), and His Church is in submission to God the Son. Therefore, wives are to submit to their husbands just the same as they submit to God (verse 22). 

But what about the words being used in the verses above? Is "being in subjection to" the same as "submission"? Is God saying that the husband is totally in charge of the wife, as Christ is in charge of His Church? In everything? Some versions of the Bible don't even use this language. They read that wives should "respect" their husbands. No way near what the verses above from the King James version say. So to avoid the confusion this causes, and to clarify what God is saying here, we need to go back to the source: the original Greek New Testament texts.

Submission - Subjection: What's the Difference?


Well, in the context of these passages: nothing.

Let's look at the Greek: 

The Greek word translated as "submit" in Ephesians 5:22 is "Hupotasso". This is a portmanteau - two words joined together to make a new one. "Hupo" means to be underneath, under, or below. "Tasso" means to ordain or to appoint ones own authority or responsibility, to obey. Therefore "Hupotasso" means to place oneself under and obey someone else's authority.


When we look at the words "subject" and "subjection" in Ephesians and 1 Peter, the same Greek word is used - Hupotasso. 

So, submit, submission, subject and subjection are all the same: Hupotasso. "Place yourself under the authority of and obey" in this case, your husband, just as the Church is under the authority of Christ.

"Obey"??? Are you serious???!!!


Yes! "Even as Sara obeyed Abraham..."! Again: Hupotasso - obey like Sarah did.

So what about the words "every thing"? Does that mean that a wife is to blindly obey their husbands no matter what he is demanding she does?


The Greek word translated here as "every thing" or "everything" is "Pas". Pas means "whole, all manner of means, one way, all, thoroughly". Yep - everything

However!

As Christians, to blindly follow the orders of another is foolishness and a slippery slope into sin. We know that we must never allow ourselves to go against anything in God's word, even if the husband is telling the wife to do so. Alongside the commands for wives to obey their husbands, both writers admonish husbands to treat their wives with love, respect, and as they would treat their ownselves. They also are reminded that God is the ultimate authority and that all men must answer for their actions before God. He will hold us all to account for what we are doing and He is quite clear in what happens to those who lead others astray. 

A wife does not have to obey those things that go directly against God's word.


Should a husband ask his wife to lie, cheat, steal, curse, get drunk, abuse another, watch pornography, commit aldutery, commit any crime, or do anything else that directly goes against God's Word, she has the right to refuse. God's authority comes first and He is in charge of both the husband and wife. End of story.

Ladies, you need to be careful here though. Just because something is outside of your comfort zone, it does not mean it's outside of God's word. If the Bible is not clear on something, then it's not up to you to decide to disobey your husband, just because what he his asking you to do makes you a bit uncomfortable. As I said, your husband is answerable to God and he needs to ensure that the path he is leading you on is in line with God's Word. But it is not your place to correct him on that - that is God's domain, not yours and only He has the authority to do so. If your husband is asking you to go along with something that makes you uncomfortable, you should respectfully speak your mind, explain how it is making you feel, pray about it, then keep your peace. It is then up to your husband to decide if he wishes to continue down that path. If he chooses to continue despite your misgivings, then as a submissive wife, you are commanded to obey. 

"...Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement."



Lastly, let's take a look at this passage. Here Peter is encouraging wives to submit to and obey their husbands, using the great Jewish matriarch Sarah as the example to follow. Remember, God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow, and Peter is pointing this out in using her as an example. In modern terms, he is saying that if it was good enough for her back then, it's good enough for you now! 

So Sarah was in such a submissive state to her husband that she called him "lord"? Surely not! Actually she did: "Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?" (Genesis 18:12). You know the story here: Sarah and Abraham are old and "way past it" but have no children. God visits Abraham to tell him he will have a son in his old age, and Sarah doesn't believe it at first. But notice how she addresses Abraham here: she calls him "lord".

OK, so like we did with Hupotasso, let's look at the original word for "lord" that the English translation came from. Here we have a unique opportunity to look at this word from a couple of angles: Old Testament Hebrew and New Testament Greek.

Hebrew: Adon (English transliteration)
- Sovereign; controller; master; owner; Sir.

Greek: Kurios
- Supreme in authority; controller; master; Sir

Good grief! Sarah considered her husband to be her sovereign, supreme in authority, her master, her owner and Sir!

That's how submissive she was!

Peter points out here that not only does Sarah honour her own husband with the title "lord", but she is not afraid to do so. And he encourages wives today to do the same! "...as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement". Not only was Sarah not afraid to call her husband "lord", but she was not "amazed" by it. In other words, it just came naturally! She saw it as a natural reflection of her own God-ordained submission to her husband to call him "lord".

So in conclusion, wives are commanded:

  1. To place themselves under the authority of their husbands and obey them (hupotasso);
  2. To be obedient to their husbands in everything (pas), except where it contravenes God's Word;
  3. To not be afraid to refer to their husbands as lord, master, Sir, etc. as this is a natural reflection of their innermost submissive heart.

I'll end this blog post by asking my opening question again:

How submissive are you really? 

Do fully submit to your husband? 
In everything? 
And are you submissive enough to call him "lord", "master", or "Sir"?


Something to contemplate...
 ...and maybe act on?




Wednesday, 7 August 2019

So who's really in charge here?


For wives who like to be in control

Wives, do you like to have things done your way? Do you like being in charge in your marriage? Do you use your "feminine whiles/charms" to influence your husband? Do you like the empowerment that you feel from that? How about using tactics like pouting, the silent treatment, "not tonight, I have a headache", or simply a disapproving look to let your husband know that you are not happy with something he has or has not done? Or nagging, or arguing, or telling your husband he is wrong, in order to get your own way. What about the little subtle acts of disrespect or put-downs in order to bring him down to a level that you feel is where he should be? What about how you speak of him in public, using language that lowers his status and raises yours?

What if I were to tell you that all of the above is SIN 
and if you do these things you need to REPENT?!

Yes, it absolutely is sinful to behave in this manner. It's manipulation. It's self-serving. It's selfish. It goes directly against God's word. Not only that, it's sin in the fact that you are stepping out of your role as dictated by God and into a role you were never created to take: Being the boss.

I see this sort of behaviour all the time. Even in church circles. Even Pastors wives behaving like this! What a great example they are showing to other wives in God's church - NOT! It's simply unacceptable!!! 

The Bible is very clear on who is the boss, what a woman's place is in marriage and how wives are to treat their husband:

"But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence." 1 Timothy 2:12

"...and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." Genesis 3:16

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Ephesians 5:22

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." 1 Corinthians 11:3

"To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:5

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord." Colosians 3:18

There are more verses like this if you do some searching, but the point here is that God expects wives to be humble, under their husbands authority, and to not try and usurp that, ever. 

Your husband is the boss of you, end of story!

Some Christian writers lament the way that submission and obedience of women to their husbands has become a dirty concept and undermined by feminism today. I agree, but feminism has only accelerated something that has been around for millennia. As Solomon said, "...there is nothing new under the sun" (Ecclesiastes 1:9).  Let's take a look at some examples from Biblical history where women have defied God and manipulated men to get their own way:
  • Eve convincing Adam that eating the forbidden fruit wouldn't harm them (Genesis 3)
  • Sarah defying God and getting Abraham to have sex with her servant so she could gain a son (Genesis 16:1-4)
  • Lot's daughters getting him drunk and having sex with him in order to have children (Genesis 19:30-38)
  • Rachel convincing Jacob to have sex with her servant so she could have children by her (Genesis 30:1-5)
  • Leah following Rachel's example and convincing Jacob to sleep with her servant in order to have more children (Genesis 30:9-10)
  • Moses' wife taking it upon herself to circumcise their son then yelling abuse at Moses afterwards (Exodus 4:25-26)
  • Miriam defying her brother Moses and punished with leprosy (Numbers 12:1-10)
  • Naomi and Ruth manipulating Boaz into marrying Ruth by sleeping with him (Ruth 3,4)
  • Michal being ashamed of her husband David and mocking him because he danced for the Lord (2 Samuel 6:14-23)
  • Bathsheba deliberately bathing naked in full view of David's palace so he would see her, desire her and sleep with her. She became complicit in her own husband's murder in order to become Queen (2 Samuel 11)
  • Jezebel - Don't get me started on Jezebel! If there was ever a more narcissistic, selfish, self-absorbed, completely evil woman in the Bible than her, I don't know! Read all about her totally corrupt ways in 1 Kings16:29-33; 18:4,13; 19:1-2;  21:1-24; 2 Kings 9:22,30-37
As you can see, women manipulating their husbands is nothing new - feminism has just amplified it and legitimised it!

So let me ask you, wife reading this. Examine your heart: do you manipulate your husband? Do you try and control him? Do you seek to control your environment by usurping his authority? By being less than submissive in EVERYTHING (Ephesians 5:24)? If you take a good hard look at yourself, do you REALLY reverence your husband or are you defying God in disrespecting his God-ordained position (Ephesians 5:33)? What about control in the bedroom? Do you try and get your own way there? Do you truly surrender yourself to your husband as Christ surrendered Himself to the cross for you? Or do you try and exert control there too?

If you have read this and are feeling pangs of guilt due to trying to be the boss, then here's what you need to do:
  1. Get down on your knees, NOW!
  2. Confess your sin to God;
  3. Repent of your sin before God and ask for His forgiveness;
  4. Ask Him to teach you how to fully submit to your husband and show him reverence in everything;
  5. Get up and go to your husband;
  6. Demonstrate your submission and vulnerability by getting on your knees before him;
  7. Confess your sin to him;
  8. Ask for his forgiveness;
  9. Promise to him that with God's help you will strive to submit to him as God commands;
  10. Sin no more.
"For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Ephesians 5:23-24


Monday, 15 July 2019

The Head Of What Now???


Is the husband really supposed to be the head of the home?


"For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Ephesians 5:23-24 KJV


I read a lot of Christian writers and hear a lot of speakers talking about how the man is the head of the home. I also read a few Christian women writing about how proudly submissive to their husbands they are, wearing it like some kind of badge of honour, and how delighted they are that their husbands are the head of their home. People even have an acronym for it: HoH (Head of the Home/House/Household)

But here's the thing:

You will not find that written anywhere in the Bible.


Seriously! Nowhere in the Bible does it specifically say that the husband is the head of his home. Nowhere

Sure, it gives lots of examples where the man is leading his family, being the figurehead of his household, in charge of the servants, his children, and his wife (or wives in some cases!). Paul even says that Deacons and Bishops should be good leaders of their own home, with well behaved, obedient children. But he never says that the husband is to be the head of the home.

What God does say in His word is that the husband is to be the head of the wife. The wife specifically.

What's the difference then if the wife is submissive to her husband and we say that the man is the head of the home? It's the same thing isn't it? Michael, aren't you just splitting hairs?

It actually makes a huge difference. Verse 24 of Ephesians 5 makes this clear:

"Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." (KJV)


Marriage (and homes and households) are designed to be a reflection of Christ's relationship with God the Father and His Church's relationship to Himself. As Christ submitted to the Father, He came under His Headship. As Jesus' church, we in turn are under the Headship of Him. We submit to Christ and He is our Head. Marriage therefore, as mentioned in the passage above and repeated elsewhere in His word, is a reflection of this relationship. As we as a church submit to Jesus and His Headship, wives are commanded to submit to their husbands and his headship. Therefore, the husband is the head of the wife.

The devil is always seeking to confuse and water down God's word. In saying that "the husband is the head of the home" or just giving him the trite "HoH" moniker, we are reducing the husband's true role in reflecting Christ and His church. When we refuse to acknowledge the true role of the husband in marriage, we denigrate God's word and do the devil's work for him. Satan must rub his hands in glee every time he hears or sees it! And as marriage is a reflection of the church, when we fail to lift up the husband's true role, we also bring the church down. Instead of presenting "it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing..." (Ephesians 5:27 KJV) and sanctified and cleansed "with the washing of water by the word" (Ephesians 5:26 KJV), we present it to our Lord  as something watered down, less than sanctified, dirty and diminished by our own pride.

No, God's Word is very clear:

Husbands are the head of the wife.


Everything else in the home then falls under this headship. This is how God designed it.

So is this true for your marriage? If not, I suggest you get on your knees, repent, ask for forgiveness, then realign your marriage to God's perfect will. Today.


Wednesday, 10 July 2019

That Dirty Word!

"What do you mean I have to submit to my husband!?"

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Ephesians 5:22

Some-one recently said that it's the most hated word in the Bible. That word "submit". It's so hated that a lot of preachers won't teach on it. And a lot that do, water it down in order to not offend people, or to pander to the rampant feminism that is so prevalent in today's church. I have seen people explain it away as not really meaning "submit" in our modern usage, but what the Bible is really saying is to "show respect". Some other "experts" say it means to "identify with" or "be in support of". Others say "it's an outdated term, OK for ancient times, but not relevant today". Others that it's a reflection of the patriarchy that was part of the culture in Biblical society, and in our modern, enlightened era, it has no place.

I disagree. Read on...

First of all, the Bible clearly states that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. "For I am the Lord, I change not; therefore ye sons of Jacob are not consumed." (Malachi 3:6 KJV) He never changes and He never lies: "God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent..." (Numbers 23:19 KJV). His word never changes either: "The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever." (Isaiah 40:8 KJV).

So the fact stands that Ephesians 5:22 is as relevant today as it was back then, and it will be from this day forward until the end of time!

What about it only being relevant in the patriarchal culture of Paul's time? Well, that's a pretty thin argument, because God doesn't really care for the cultures of man. He transcends them. The God of the Hebrew is the same God of the Greek, the European, the African, the Asian, the Australian, the American, and so on. “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28 KJV).

He is the God of all, and of all cultures, past, present and future. 

So we come to the meaning of the word "submit". Does it mean "show respect"? "Identify with"? "Be in support of?" To get to the bottom of this, we need to look at the original text that the English Bible is translated from. As this is in the New Testament, we need to look at the Greek word. The word "submit" in English is translated from the Greek word "Hupotasso". This literally translates as:

To arrange under, to subordinate; to subject, put in subjection; to subject one's self, obey; to submit to one's control; to yield to one's admonition or advice; to obey, be subject.

Hmm. Obey??? Be in subjection to??? Subordinate??? To arrange under??? To submit to one's control??? It's actually a bit stronger a word than what most people would feel comfortable preaching about! The Bible also translates Hupotasso as "obey" in other verses (Titus 2:5, for one example). How do you feel about that "dirty" word now? Ephesians 5:22 could read "Wives obey your husbands..." and it would still be correct!

The Greek word is actually made up of the two words "Hupo" and "Tasso" which mean "under authority" and "to place oneself". It was a term used in Greek armies to designate subordination of soldiers under their officers.

You'll also notice that Ephesians 5:22 is constructed not as a suggestion, or as "I would like you to..." but rather it is a direct command: "...submit yourselves...". God is commanding you to submit to your husband. So in answer to the question about "that dirty word":

Yes, the Word of God here is saying to wives that they are to place themselves under the authority of their husbands. Wives are to be subject to, obey, be subordinate to and yield control of themselves to their husbands.

Yes wife, you HAVE TO submit to your husband. God commands it!

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